HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO ME AND A GIFT FOR YOU.

Today…the day I am writing this… is my birthday.

I am, as of approximately 8:45 tonight, 65 years old!

I always thought 65 was old.

I was wrong!

Sixty-five is wonderful, is what it is!

Yes, there are things I can’t do today that I could do when I was 20 or 30…or even 55.

Some of those limitations are my own fault. One good example is that when I broke my wrist so badly last year, I didn’t do what I could have to regain the strength I lost during my recuperation. Or the year before that, when I had pneumonia.

That old adage, ‘Use it or lose it’ is absolutely true!

There was a time, not too long ago, when if I decided I wanted to give my kitchen a good cleaning, the whole job got done in one day. I don’t think that’s gonna happen anymore! All the bending and stretching and climbing is a whole lot harder on me now than it used to be.

Yesterday, when I had decided that I’d done enough of cleaning for the day, I told my husband that I’d finish the job ‘tomorrow.’ He said, “You can’t do that. Tomorrow is your birthday!”

I said, rather like a 5 year old, “I will if I want to!”


And, I will.

If I want to.


You see, I had one of those AHA moments when I turned 50.

It occurred to me that, like it or not, I was living the second half of my life…and there wouldn’t be another half after that! And that if I was ever going to do ‘what I want to’, it had to be NOW! I couldn’t put it off any longer.

It took a little time for me to break the lifetime habits of doing what I ‘ought’ to most of the time.

But remembering a story my mother had told me was a big help.

It seems that back when I was a toddler, my mom had an idea for a dress she wanted to make for me and she was all excited about it. My mother was a skillful and creative seamstress and she was definitely in ‘creative mode.’

So, one morning, as soon as she got Dad off to work, she got her sewing machine set up in the living room and followed her creative muse…with joy in her heart! She left the breakfast dishes and the bed-making till ‘later.’

But before ‘later’ came, there was a knock on the door.

It was my mother’s older sister, come for a surprise visit, from hundreds of miles away.

My mother never really got over her shame at being caught with her housework not done BEFORE she ‘played.’

She never said so, but my guess is that after she finished that dress for me, she never saw it without being reminded of her ‘shame.’

That breaks my heart!

She did tell me that she never again ‘played’ before having her house company ready.

That breaks my heart some more.


In his book A NEW EARTH, Eckhar Tolle teaches that there are only three healthy ways to do anything.
 
One is with acceptance. 
We all know that cleaning the toilet is not necessarily something we ordinarily would be either joyful or enthusiastic about.  But, we 'accept' that it is a necessary part of a healthy environment...and so we do it for that reason.

One is with pure joy.
I watch the birds in my back yard because it gives me enormous joy and pleasure to do so.  We all have such pass times that we enjoy and do for that reason alone.

One is with enthusiasm.
The word 'enthusiam' literally means 'in God.'  It is a wave of creative energy flowing through you.  I often feel this when I am painting. But it can come in many other ways...not just the typically 'creative' outlets.

He, Tolle, says that if you are not doing something for at least one of those reasons, you should simply stop doing it because doing it will lead to unhappiness...in some form.

That teaching reinforced my belief about doing what I 'want' to do as much as possible. I try to follow that sage advice.

This morning, when I woke up, there was a painting in my head. I have no idea how this painting is going to turn out, but I do know this. It will be one of my very favorite paintings I’ve ever done.

Because, what I saw in my head was me…looking up and out toward a beautiful space of light and love and infinite possibilities! And that is exactly how I feel on this, my 65th birthday. And, I’m blessed and GRATEFUL to say, that’s the way I feel every morning. Life has never been as exciting to me as it is right now.

As I write this, I keep thinking of some really special young women in my life….and maybe a couple who aren’t so young, but just as special.

I want to tell you this.

I know that we are indoctrinated, especially us women, to think that doing anything for ourselves is selfish. It is NOT! It is self-loving, self-nurturing and self-fulfilling...all of which is necessary to be a healthy human being who has the capacity to give to others in a good and healthy manner!

I know, too, that when you have children and grandchildren…. dogs and cats…. a husband and a job and each days’ ‘to-do’ list seems never-ending, it’s really hard to just ‘do what you want to do.’

But, I implore you to make time, religiously, to do just that. Even if only for a few minutes….and if not every day, then, at least a couple of times a week.


Here’s why.

Whether you realize it or not, the day will come when your bum knee or your arthritic hands or your waning stamina won’t allow you to do those things anymore. Don’t waste the opportunities you have now to do them!

Maybe more importantly, continually doing things for the wrong reason surely does create something in your life. But it’s not a good something. It creates resentment and that will absolutely rob you of your joy and maybe turn you into a crabby old woman.

My friend, Sheila Kingsley, wrote this wonderful poem and graciously allowed me to share it here.

LUNAR LAUGHTER

The moon pulls on salty seas,

Teases salty blood

And laughs mockingly on high

At Mankind who, though made of mud,

Was born to fly.

Yes…we were born to fly! So don’t, for the love of all that is Holy, let your wings wither and die.

By the way, this is good advice for you guys, too.

I hope you take it.

I am more GRATEFUL today, than I was yesterday. I expect to be more GRATEFUL tomorrow, than I am today. I expect my GRATITUDE to grow, until the moment I simply fly away…...

.....straight into that beautiful, glorious, love and light…

.....and even more wonderful possibilities!